When we release trauma from the body we create much greater depth as human beings, accessing our innate capabilities of wisdom, intuition, unconditional love and divine purpose.
We are born primed for affection, attunement, and connection; look into a baby’s eyes and all you’ll see is unconditional love and openness to connection. However if we do not receive the warmth and love we need as children (usually because our caregivers are too shut down and conditioned themselves) we interpret this as meaning we are not worthy of love; that relationships are unsafe, and that the world is hostile. We realise this from a young age but because the enormity of it is too much to bear it is repressed into the subconscious, and we develop all kinds of maladaptive behaviours in order to never feel this pain again. We split off from that part of us that was rejected; our true self; and it becomes unacceptable to us too. Furthermore we deny that part of us that was angry for being rejected and who is still desperate for connection, and it becomes our ‘shadow’.
“The shadow is the block that separates us most effectively from the divine voice. There is no coming to consciousness without pain. To confront a person with his own shadow is to show him his own light. Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it Fate.” Carl Jung.
We have all been conditioned and rejected to some degree in our lives and so separated from our true selves. We attempt to fill this void with distractions such as social media ‘approval’, our screens, power, jobs, possessions and relationships. The difference for some is that they have experienced so much trauma or are so sensitised to it that living in this disconnected state becomes unbearable; they feel the separation so acutely they can no longer be distracted by society’s offerings.
Thus at some point there comes a realisation that there must be more meaning to life than just re-experiencing the same patterns and hurt and learning to live with it; or a greater purpose to experiencing excruciating pain. This might happen as a profound awakening such as a sudden kundalini awakening, a complete breakdown or Dark Night of the Soul, or a more gradual ‘waking up’ to greater meaning with flashes of knowing, synchronicities and ‘signs’ pointing to the realisation that there is more to life than you had previously perceived. In the course of human life, few experiences can be as profound and transformative as those of a spiritual awakening. A direct experience of the divine represents a paradigm shift of the highest order.
Your Ego however is likely to re-emerge at this point and try to own your newly discovered revelation for itself, in the guise of being ‘spiritual’ or knowing something others don’t know. It might tell you that you’re enlightened, that you don’t need to look any further than that because you’re aware and awake to something beyond most people’s understanding. But all that matters is that you don’t get stuck at this point. It’s very easy to use spirituality to justify not being in our bodies; after all if we’re not in our bodies it can feel like we’ve transcended them, that we don’t need to feel our pain or be triggered by those around us. It can also feel really, really good!
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However the purpose of being born on this Earth as a human being is not to transcend the body and it’s experience it is to process our trauma and reclaim our shadows, and become our divine selves in a grounded and present and whole human body. That is what is meant by Heaven on Earth. Otherwise you may be able to awaken somewhat on a mind level, and you might be able to reach states of bliss with spiritual practices, but you won’t feel love deeply embodied in your heart because there are still so many defences in place.
The answer cannot be found in transcendence, we must turn our attention downwards and within. We must learn to reside in our bodies again through surrendering the very instrument that seemed to protect us initially, our egoic minds, yet which is actually the cause of our deepest pain. When we remove the blockages to presence we make space for spirit to live within us, and reveal itself as the source of profound love that we have been looking for all our lives, because we have an open heart. This is trauma’s sacred gift.